Debunking Diets: How to Lose Weight through Compassionate Acceptance by Vibhooti Kumar
All of us grow up with labels that become embedded in our mind’s files which change the perception of ourselves and our self-worth.
We receive these labels from friends, family, and peers. For me, there were some good labels, but my consciousness grabbed onto the negative ones. The most hurtful labels were that I was lazy, fat and forgetful.
I grew up without a lot of self-worth. Even at 18 when I was a size three, I don’t remember feeling thin.
When I look back at my childhood pictures, I question those labels and the people from whom they came. As I reflect back, I can see when self-doubt started entering my psyche and how my files got corrupted. The abusive patterns of inner chatter brought in feelings of lack and doubt. Self-abuse then replaced self-love.
Personally, growing meant the process of removing unwanted labels/files from my system. It meant taking charge of myself and questioning my beliefs. It meant observing the inner chatter and recognizing the manipulations that were part of my mind’s makeup. It meant that being honest with myself was the first step into my healing. It’s been a long journey. Now I can look back, see the progress, and rejoice. The path into self-love has also taught me how to feel love and compassion for others. Many teachers have come along, and one very recently.
I met Alfonso De Rose one afternoon by accident at The Bodhi Tree Bookstore in Los Angeles. My inquisitive mind took me to a workshop that was just about to end. Curious to know who had spoken that day, I went inside. Hmm...weight loss—not my favorite subject and one I had given up on. For 20 years, my weight had been rising steadily with no sign of relenting. The reporter in me decided to question De Rose, a tall dark Italian with intense eyes, a firm demeanor, and of course, an Italian accent. He told me that we need to enjoy food and eat whatever we love. Good, I thought, because I hate diets and will not go on any crazy eating philosophy. I liked what he had to say and felt confident that I would learn something new. A week later, I was taking his workshop. After three days, the time came to test the scales. Much to my surprise, I was six pounds lighter—and I’m currently down 17 pounds.
What happened to me? I found my inner strength and discovered how to enjoy my relationship with food. I became a student of De Rose’s Thinner Journey and am learning the art of compassionate acceptance. Recently, I had the pleasure of asking De Rose a few questions about how it all works.
Vision Magazine: What is the secret to permanent and successful weight loss?
Alfonso De Rose: Your body is an exact reflection of how you feel inside…in the invisible world of your mind, your emotions, and your spirit. For example, if you have a rash on your skin, it shows that in the inner world, you are stressed, in pain, or maybe sad. In the same way, to resolve the overweight issue, we need to do the work from within. Your body is a reflection of your inner world. Your physical body is only one percent of who you really are, and 99 percent is composed of your mental body, your emotional body and your ethereal body.
VM: What is Thinner Journey?
ADR: Thinner Journey works at the root cause; this is where you have to release the weight. We normally think that in order to shed a few pounds, we have to avoid certain foods, go on a diet, or start some intense exercise program. These changes might work for some time, but eventually we gain everything back, and sometimes more. There is only one way to keep your body healthy and slim. When you learn to love yourself through your body as it is, you learn to release the weight you are holding onto. It is amazing how obedient your body temple really is. This is how we get results; this is true weight loss, and this is the Thinner Journey.
VM: So how do we learn to truly love ourselves?
ADR: The ideal woman’s body shape is always changing. For example, in the 1800s, plump women were considered beautiful. Nowadays, a skinny body is everyone’s perfect body image. We feel that if we are not skinny, we are not lovable. Television, magazines and the media in general have created this false body image. I call it The Hollywood Syndrome. So whose body image do we believe? Are we looking from the eyes of Monet, who worshipped fuller women, or from Hollywood’s ideal of a skinny body?
The truth is that only two percent of women are naturally skinny like models. The rest come in different shapes, heights, and weights. The answer is that whatever shape we are, and whatever we look like, we need to accept ourselves fully. With this acceptance, something miraculous happens and you start radiating a light, a beauty, and a grace. Just as in nature, you will never see an ugly animal. They don’t have the capacity to judge themselves, or a desire to be anything different than what they are.
Self-hatred and self-judgment are only human phenomena and their effects are devastating on the body we perceive externally. The very seed of love, whether it is romantic or a higher agape state, starts with self-love of our own bodies. So, when you wake up in the morning, look at yourself naked. Be with your body without judging it. Tell your body, “I love you,” be thankful to your body, and really feel this love. Find time to take care of your body and indulge in pampering it. By doing this, your will start to see changes. Self-love is true body sculpting.
Attend Thinner Journey in Los Angeles March 19-21 at the Crowne Plaza Hotel at LAX. For more information, visit takeyourrisk.com or call 310.642.7500.