Back to August 2007
Viewpoint – August 2007
The 21st
Century Family
by Derek Shaw
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Voicemails, emails, text and instant messaging, blogs and file sharing…welcome to a digital world linked by wires, cords and buttons. In the workplace, the technological boom has amplified multi-tasking and individual responsibility. People are so bound to their technological devices that they allow those outlets to become inlets. Folks now communicate in a shared global network, and consequently, it's easier than ever to keep in touch. The irony is that despite the connections provided by technology, families are more detached than ever. People are used to convenience and instant gratification: they want things done immediately and efficiently at all costs.
According to the Child Trends Databank, “In 2003, more than three out of four children (76 percent) ages three to 17 had access to a computer at home, up from 15 percent in 1984. Forty-two percent used the Internet at home, nearly double the percentage who had used it in 1997.”
Kids and adults alike have been forced to adapt to a rapidly changing social environment.
Humans are increasingly reliant on gadgets as surrogate laborers. This has made our society less tolerant, less motivated and lazier than ever. Everyone wants a computer that can do it all, rather than searching for new things to do for themselves. The Internet infatuation is contagious, and the dependency on technology is detrimental to our social development. We've become so accustomed to living through our computer that face-to-face interaction has been compromised. People no longer meet in person because they know a quick digital message will suffice. Unfortunately, families are feeling the strain of this change.
Children are becoming digitally nurtured by computers, video games and other forms of electronic entertainment, and these have replaced the outdoor activities once taken for granted in American culture. According to the National Retail Federation's 2007 Back-to-School survey quoted by Reuters News Service (July 17, 2007), “Families with school-age children are expected to spend $563.49 this year for school-related gear” and “electronics should capture the biggest sales increase, with families spending $129.24 on electronics — up 13 percent from a year ago." Those park playgrounds, ballgames and beach excursions are becoming things of the past. Youth activities often take place in front of a television or computer screen these days. Parents don't seem to mind that their kids are occupied in this way. They are allowing technology to serve as a babysitter.
Some adults argue that technology bridges the generation gap by allowing them to better relate. Children often have their own cell phones, and parents like the fact that they can contact their kids at all times. But digital communication isn't a substitute for personal contact. The more we allow technology to do the talking, the more our interpersonal skills diminish. Conversations between parents and children build relationships, instill values and form bonds.
Families should consider these questions about their day-to-day lives: Why eat out when you can sit at the dinner table and interact with each other in your own home? Why “veg out” in front of the television when a game of Scrabble or cards creates family interaction? It's the seemingly small moments, these invaluable opportunities to communicate openly, which define a family and bring its members closer together.
Whether it's a board game, eating a meal together or a Saturday afternoon playing miniature golf, seek out hobbies that everyone can enjoy. In a progressively concrete society, the need for recreation, especially in the outdoors, is greater than ever. Go hiking, biking, camping, walking. Do something as a unit. Try yoga together, take a weekender to the local mountains, go fishing at the river or get a family membership to the gym. Any one of these activities will do wonders for your collective well-being. Parents can improve their children's health when they lead by example.
Kids love their technological goodies, but it's important they don't get too attached. They must understand that a quality life requires balance. Find the things you have in common and share them. Be upfront with your family so they know your intentions.
You want them to be happy and healthy, and together you can achieve that goal while enhancing the vitality of your own mind, body and soul. Spirituality and community can be cultivated in many ways. Even if it only means walking the dog together or doing chores around the house, parents must make time for their kids and fortify familial relations.
Don't let the television or Internet raise your kids. Your children have greater access to information than any past generation and the ability to communicate with anyone, anywhere, anytime. Those digital resources to which they've become so accustomed can make them smarter, but a balanced life necessitates parental guidance and collaboration.
Derek Shaw is a musician, skateboarder and writer. He loves his black lab Spot, and Spot loves him. Visit him (and his band) at www.myspace.com/thedoomsdaydevice.